People when angry or upset or triggered can communicate clearly but I am not like that. Something just shuts down in my mind as if by not thinking too much, I won’t remember too much. So if this post doesn’t seem fluid, it’s because that’s not the point. The point is that men need to know that every girl needs to be protected, irrespective of where or what or who she is.
When I was attacked in 2017, I was pinned down by a man who grabbed my neck in a chokehold and calmly explained how he would rape me if I tried to shout.
I never used to be scared of the dark or imagine someone sneaking up on me or jerking awake suddenly when I hear a loud bang. It didn’t use to matter if there were only men on the bus or more men than women; I just wanted to get where I was going quickly and safely.
Now, I carry this fear all about!
I don’t hate men because I have brothers and most of my closest friends are guys: so it is really difficult to come and say I hate men.
However, all these senseless, disdainful acts of violence are perpetuated by different people and the constant similarity between all these people, apart from the darkness in their souls, is that THEY ARE MEN.
It doesn’t matter if they’re church leaders, CEOs, directors, managers, touts, hawkers, gate keepers, dullards, brainiacs, entrepreneurs, professionals; they are MEN. Men who use brutal force to get what they want and destroy lives, while at it.
They don’t look so powerful when they’re caught. They don’t seem so scary when another man stands up to them. They don’t look so scary when it’s time to answer for their crimes.
Men who should be protectors are now the ones who are doing the most to endanger the ones they should protect; acts of Terrorism, Domestic Violence, Sexual Abuse, Rape, Murder and Dehumanization et cetera.
The strength that, they should use to build up, has become tool to tear down and oppress.
The strength that should uphold has become the tool that is used to trample upon others.
The strength that should be used to till the ground aka focus on their craft and grow businesses, has brought more death than life.
When you get to the corridors of power, it’s not the reason to misuse authority. You should provide safe environs, protect those you lead and guide them till they attain their best.
When you help ladies, don’t expect them to pay back with sex. Don’t assume that gratitude is fully expressed by gropping or touching inappropriately.
When victims speak up, DO NOT TRY TO MAKE IT THEIR FAULT!
IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT SHE IS WEARING!
DOESN’T MATTER WHERE SHE IS OR WHAT TIME IT WAS!
UWA was in Church, reading a book; how much more sacrosanct could the atmosphere be?
The Bible says in Hebrew 6:6 that when someone turns away from the faith, it’s like nailing Christ to the cross all over again.
That’s the same thing when you disbelieve victims; you cause them the pain all over again.
Even in countries where justice is still hanging on, these acts still thrive. So let’s first do the right thing until the system has no choice but to conform to our standard of godly living and love for one another.
To those who gets triggered again by these dastardly acts, who have to relieve the nightmare because no matter how long ago it was, THIS WOMAN IS YOU AS YOU WERE/ARE HER. You are not alone. You are enough. It is not your fault. It never was and you are stronger than we all give you credit for.
Like I said before, I don’t hate men but we need to start camps, conferences, seminars, conversations that teach men on how not to be unfortunate. Let’s leave women and all the focus on self development and self help, it is becoming obvious that MEN NEED THEM MORE.
NO MEANS NO!
STOP RAPING WOMEN!
STOP ABUSING WOMEN!
